Open wounds...
Today I worked at the Casa de Lúcia. Basically I sit at the exit all day telling people who try to enter that the entrance is around the corner. I help (older) women down the stairs, and I provide information about the house and family, when needed.
Sometimes it's pretty dull, but at other times there's great conversations (like the couple from California I met last week). Today the conversation that hit me the most was with a woman from Philly (originally from Northern Ireland)... It came up that I was a Boston seminarian, and she questioned how my faith withstood the eruption of the clerical abuse scandal (of which Boston is considered the epicenter in the US scandal). I explained the good holy priests I knew growing up and how the example they provided showed me true priestly ministry, therefore I tried to ignore the media portrayal making all priests out to be pedophiles. The example and friendship of good, holy priests helped me "get through" the dark days in 2002.
She responded in a 180...the scandal caused her to leave the church. She then excused herself to tour the house. While she was touring I prayed for the opportunity to talk to her again. As she was exiting she asked if I needed water. (I did, but quickly changed the subject). I asked her if she was still away from the church. She said she never planned to come back because she's a good person who loves God so why does she need the church. My first question was, "what about the Eucharist? You need to be part of the church to be spiritually fed" --which turned our conversation to her beliefs (or lack of) in transubstantiation and the authenticity of the Bible (of which I will spare all the details), and the power of the "man made church" to make you believe that they want to you believe. We would have talked for a while, but her group was waiting for her so they could leave. I asked if I could post one last question. I asked her to think about "man made organizations" throughout history...and to look at how long they lasted. Then I asked her to look at the church... And I asked how she could withstand everything she has been through the past 2,000 years if she were a "man made organization"... My last part was telling her that the church is spiritual... Guided by the Holy Spirit, and Christ is her head..I concluded the conversation by letting her know I would pray for her.
This led me to think most of the day about scraping my knees open.
Random? Well...Have you ever scraped your knee open, and needed to put a bandaid over the open wound?
There are certain parts of the body (tips of fingers, toes, knees, especially of they are surrounded by hair, etc) that are very difficult to have a bandaid over. You can't move the part of the body without being reminded that there is something there covering a wound. One learns that they have to adapt how they're accustomed to moving that body part so as to cause as little discomfort as possible.
Then there's also the wound itself. One needs to have carefully washed out the cut before applying the disinfecting ointment and bandaid. Without this step, the chances of an infection increase.
I came to the realization that SO many people have spiritual wounds that are infected. What I mean by this statement is that something happened in their lives that caused them to flee from God, to flee from His church. Their wounds never properly healed, so their hurts (wounds if you will) remain and never get better.
Hopefully God used me for today in this conversation to start healing in that woman's heart.
See, for spiritual wounds to heal, they need to be reopened, then they need to be disinfected, and then the bandaid needs to be put on the just cleaned wound to allow it to heal.
The cleaning process is very uncomfortable... And at times painful. It hurts us and we just want to stop the cleaning process....But we must press on!
After cleaning... We put a bandaid over the wound to allow it to heal. Then the location of the bandaid and how it makes our skin feel when we move is a constant reminder to us of the wound... But (and this is the key!!) with TIME the wound is healed! We can then remove the bandaid and look at the location of where the cut was to see that it is properly healed...
Personally, I know that's something I needed to hear for myself... I often
get frustrated with my "wounds" wondering why God hasn't healed them... Why I still have the hurt and discomfort...
Just like a scrape on the knees that heal after a few days... Spiritual wounds can be healed. I need to just trust that God will do it in His time, and be patient in knowing that my time is not His time, but that He will heal all wounds...
Nossa Senhora de Fátima, rogai por nós!
--KPL
Sometimes it's pretty dull, but at other times there's great conversations (like the couple from California I met last week). Today the conversation that hit me the most was with a woman from Philly (originally from Northern Ireland)... It came up that I was a Boston seminarian, and she questioned how my faith withstood the eruption of the clerical abuse scandal (of which Boston is considered the epicenter in the US scandal). I explained the good holy priests I knew growing up and how the example they provided showed me true priestly ministry, therefore I tried to ignore the media portrayal making all priests out to be pedophiles. The example and friendship of good, holy priests helped me "get through" the dark days in 2002.
She responded in a 180...the scandal caused her to leave the church. She then excused herself to tour the house. While she was touring I prayed for the opportunity to talk to her again. As she was exiting she asked if I needed water. (I did, but quickly changed the subject). I asked her if she was still away from the church. She said she never planned to come back because she's a good person who loves God so why does she need the church. My first question was, "what about the Eucharist? You need to be part of the church to be spiritually fed" --which turned our conversation to her beliefs (or lack of) in transubstantiation and the authenticity of the Bible (of which I will spare all the details), and the power of the "man made church" to make you believe that they want to you believe. We would have talked for a while, but her group was waiting for her so they could leave. I asked if I could post one last question. I asked her to think about "man made organizations" throughout history...and to look at how long they lasted. Then I asked her to look at the church... And I asked how she could withstand everything she has been through the past 2,000 years if she were a "man made organization"... My last part was telling her that the church is spiritual... Guided by the Holy Spirit, and Christ is her head..I concluded the conversation by letting her know I would pray for her.
This led me to think most of the day about scraping my knees open.
Random? Well...Have you ever scraped your knee open, and needed to put a bandaid over the open wound?
There are certain parts of the body (tips of fingers, toes, knees, especially of they are surrounded by hair, etc) that are very difficult to have a bandaid over. You can't move the part of the body without being reminded that there is something there covering a wound. One learns that they have to adapt how they're accustomed to moving that body part so as to cause as little discomfort as possible.
Then there's also the wound itself. One needs to have carefully washed out the cut before applying the disinfecting ointment and bandaid. Without this step, the chances of an infection increase.
I came to the realization that SO many people have spiritual wounds that are infected. What I mean by this statement is that something happened in their lives that caused them to flee from God, to flee from His church. Their wounds never properly healed, so their hurts (wounds if you will) remain and never get better.
Hopefully God used me for today in this conversation to start healing in that woman's heart.
See, for spiritual wounds to heal, they need to be reopened, then they need to be disinfected, and then the bandaid needs to be put on the just cleaned wound to allow it to heal.
The cleaning process is very uncomfortable... And at times painful. It hurts us and we just want to stop the cleaning process....But we must press on!
After cleaning... We put a bandaid over the wound to allow it to heal. Then the location of the bandaid and how it makes our skin feel when we move is a constant reminder to us of the wound... But (and this is the key!!) with TIME the wound is healed! We can then remove the bandaid and look at the location of where the cut was to see that it is properly healed...
Personally, I know that's something I needed to hear for myself... I often
get frustrated with my "wounds" wondering why God hasn't healed them... Why I still have the hurt and discomfort...
Just like a scrape on the knees that heal after a few days... Spiritual wounds can be healed. I need to just trust that God will do it in His time, and be patient in knowing that my time is not His time, but that He will heal all wounds...
Nossa Senhora de Fátima, rogai por nós!
--KPL
Olá Kevin. Tenho acompanhado com muito interesse o teu blogue e sobretudo os teus pensamentos religiosos e espirituais. Nunca te esqueças que a vocação é também um dom. É Deus quem chama. Somos apenas instrumento. Dizemos sim, mas seja sempre feita a sua bondade. Na Eucaristia, o Santíssimo Sacramento é Santo por si mesmo, não depende da Santidade de quem a dá ou de quem a recebe. É aqui que mora o segredo da nossa vocação. Sou Padre há 10 anos. Não é fácil, há sempre muitos obstáculos, duvidas, mas surge sempre este mistério, foi Deus que me chamou, olhou para mim, fitou-me com os seus olhos. No seguimento desta confiança, descubro um amor tão grande, uma paixão tão forte que sinto que sem o Senhor não sou nada. É algo tão profundo que nunca me sinto só. Aí a Eucaristia transforma-se numa presença sem a qual eu não posso passar. O tua tentativa de abrir o coração dessa senhora, foi muito boa, mas eu acredito que aquilo que mais lhe tocou, não foram apenas as tuas palavras, mas o amor que demonstraste ao falar do Senhor. Isso até põe as pedras a louvar a grandeza do senhor.
ReplyDeleteNo Amor do Verbo Encarnado que Deus te proteja.
Padre Carlos. ulrishbpi@gmail.com